Well, I had the Splenic artery Aneurysm taken care of through an abdominal angiogram this past Thursday and I came home from the hospital Friday. Thursday was a horrible day, I didn't think a person could stand so much pain but with God by my side I made it through. Friday I felt great so they let me go home and since then I have spent most of the weekend in bed. My feeling great day was just an illusion because I have felt horrible since that day. If it wasn't for good pain killers and sleep I'd surely be back in the hospital.

Hubby called the doctor last night and he said unless my pain was over a "10" there would be no sense in going to the hospital because all they would do is watch me...which makes sense. The problem I have is how am I suppose to know what a "10" is, is it his "10" that he's talking about or is there this general concensious what a "10" should feel like? I threw up a few times yesterday and am unable to eat but its a good thing that I have some phenagran on hand or I'd not be able to stand it. So is a "10" without medicine or with it? I cannot imagine it without it because even with medicine it hurts just to breathe. Oh well, tomorrow I go back to the doctor so I guess I will just sleep until then. I did get up and take a shower, drank some sprite, and took my meds so as I wait for them to kick in I thought I'd take some time and write.

They say this was a major surgery even though I was not opened up, it lasted 4 hrs. and they put 23 coils in the aneurysm to hold it...the doctor thinks that the reason I have so much pain is that the spleen is slowly starting to die off now. Splenic Artery Aneurysm is a very rare thing, I've been searching the internet to find info but there is not alot out there. The only reason mine was found is because they were looking for something else on a cat scan. If you ever suffer from left side abdomen pain please have it checked out....if the aneurysm burst before it was repair a person could bleed to death in a very short amount of time. I am so thankful that they found it.

According to what I have learned a Splenic Artery Aneurysm only affects about 1% of the worlds population and women are at greater risk than men are. In most cases finding the aneurysm before it burst is considered an incidental finding, where it is found only when a doctor is doing a cat scan to find something else and happens upon the aneurysm. Because the spleen holds such large amounts of blood people die fairly quickly if it ruptures before it is treated. So you can see why I would thank God for this because had it not been for other things there is no telling how long I would have gone on this way or whether it would have ruptured or something. I have been so blessed to see so many miracles in my life and this is one of them!

Surgery day.....

Well I was rescheduled last Friday for my surgery on the anyeresum in the artery leading to my spleen. It was rescheduled for tomorrow - Thursday the 9th. I have to be at the hospital at 6am...boy I hate mornings! The good news is that maybe I will finally get a cortizone shot in my knee and be able to walk better and I will be able to sleep in a bed for a change! After my hospital stay last month I have been favoring my right leg and in the last week or two I have now damaged my knee. I have bad knees and ever so often I need a cortisone injection so the good news is I will probably get one in the hospital....yay!

Since I will be out of comission when Sierra starts school we went to walmart today to get school supplies and we got her hair cut at the hair salon in the store....We spent 5 hrs. in Walmart...5 hrs! Can you even imagine? I felt like I should have been paid I was there so long. Of course you think I'd have bought the store but I didn't we'll have to go back as soon as it gets cool and get clothes for winter....maybe by then I will have won the lottery and I can just have the store come to me instead like all the rich people do...hahaha

Its funny I don't have the foresight to be worried about this surgery I mean I just don't think of it as that serious but my family seems to think so. I realize that God is always with me and He is watching over me every second of every day and if its my time to go then only He knows. So in case God does call me home I love you all...my family and my friends and we'll party when ya'll get to heaven.

Oh and I have to use this blog as my confessional too..... I have to confess something really terrible I did. I use to work for Zayre's many, many years ago and back then whenever we had mismatched shoes in the shoe department we would just send them back and the shoe company would give us credit for it. Well fast forward to many years later and I have to admit I am a thief.... I bought some shoes in two different sizes but I only bought the one set and left the store with mismatched shoes!! Ok, so I still believed then that they truly turned them back in to get credit for them. So today I am in the store buying more shoes and this time I was buying two sets in two different sizes so I could make one set to fit my uneven feet and I ask the clerk if they sent their shoes back if someone bought a mismatched pair...she said, "no ma'am we don't, we consider that stealing!" Talk about feeling like a heal!(no pun intended) So I admit I stole something once and I'm very, very sorry....lol Now if I were Catholic and ya'll were priest I guess I'd be truly confessing but thank God, He is good and I don't have to ask anyone to forgive my sin but God....heck I didn't even have to tell anyone!

Well I am off to get ready for bed, 5am comes awful early....Please keep me in your prayers and I will be hollering at ya'll when I am feeling better!

Peace out!

Back to the hospital again.

Well, I went to the doctor today and he scheduled me for surgery on Aug. 3 (the day after tomorrow!) to have the anyeresum in the artery leading to my spleen taken out. He seemed to think it would be it wouldn't be a difficult procedure so I am thankful for that. I should only be in the hospital a couple days. I hope that anyone reading this would keep me in their prayers...and thanks so much for doing so. Will update more later.

Something Important on my mind.

I have had something on my mind for awhile now and I want to share this with anyone who will read this. I am posting a portion of the blog and I hope that you will click on the length and read the rest of it. Please, Please, this is such and important subject, pass it on.... share it with every person who has children.

Protecting Our Children From Sexual Predators

The other day I was flipping channels when I came across The Oprah Winfrey Show, her guests that day were former and current wives of sexual predators. So being a former wife of a sexual predator I decided to watch the show. I had not gone to any group counseling after the horrible incident in our lives so this was the first time being able to have an opportunity to relate to women who had gone through similar situations.

I cried through most of the show as I realized that these women knew exactly how I felt, they had experienced the same thoughts and feelings as I had, for the first time I didn’t feel alone. It's an odd feeling to listen to someone relive an experience they had gone through in their lives and be able to relate so closely to what they went through. Some of the very words and thoughts they shared were so similar to my own thoughts and words it was as if we were talking about the same person and the same experience.

After having watched that show it truly confirms my belief that the signs of a sexual predator are all the same. The situation in which a sexual predator comes to be in a relationship with someone with children is basically the same. These people know the type of person who could fall prey to their kind, they know the right words to say to draw us in, they know what areas in our lives are lacking, they have studied their victims even if they have never met them. Having been a victim I realize that I have a voice and I need to use it to protect other children out there from suffering as my child did at a time when I could not protect her.

To view the whole message click here.

Peace

So yesterday I was depressed and all about how long its taking me to heal and the enormous amount of pills they are making me take a day. Fortunately for you, my computer locked up before I got the chance to send it. Yes, recovery seems to be a slow process and the pills make me sick but I am getting better everyday and God is blessing me each day with renewed strength.

Today was a better day, like usual I did sleep too late but once I got up I got outside and had Jeff get the riding lawnmower out and I cut about an acre an a half of our land....not alot but its the first time I've actually road the lawnmower for more than 5 mins. ...actually it was only my 2nd time on the thing. I really enjoyed cutting the lawn, at first I was scared that I would topple over since it threw me all over the place when I'd hit a bump or two but once I got the hang of it I really enjoyed myself. I figure this is the one thing I can do to give back to Bobby and help him out because he does so much all the time, with the Louisville house, this property, and his mom's house he has alot to do and I know its not easy getting up at 3am to go to work every day. The next day I went out and cut the rest of the grass, it was hotter than the day before and I guess my asthma acted up alot more because I have a headache that won't go away. I still enjoyed the time on the mower and I can see myself doing this every week if it helps Bobby.

August 1st. I go see the doctor about removing the anyeresum from my spleen....I'm so glad because I feel like a walking time bomb, at any time this thing can bust and I'd bleed to death. Of course unless its my time to go I'm not going anywhere anyways so there is really no reason to worry. I always worry about what would happen to Sierra if something happened to me, she is a momma's girl and well she's attached a whole lot to Bobby and the boys too. Now with John Daniel going to be a daddy he's going to need someone around to tell him how to do everything the wrong way....hahaha that would be me! He's just so not ready to be a daddy...I just cannot imagine it. He is the same age I was when I found out I was preggers with him but you know I was so much more mature at his age.....mom brought us up to be self sufficient, she worked nights so we had to be. I'm trying to teach Sierra how to be self sufficient as well but John Daniel did not get that course from me.....what is that saying? You practice with the first kid and then do all the right things with the next one? I dunno bout that cuz I sure have screwed up with Sierra too. Every day is a learning experience. I miss my baby girl, she has been busy all summer and has spent very little of it at home. I guess this is a sign that she is growing up but it seems like yesterday she was just a baby. School will be starting soon and she will be home for good so I am letting her enjoy her freedom doing what she wants....soon enough she will have to be responsible for her time and be working hard at school.

As you can probably tell from my writing we have been spending alot of time down here at the farm...it has been good to be here and Bobby has gotten a taste of what driving back and forth from work will be like. It's definitely a different type of life, I feel so rested and relaxed and I don't feel boxed in anymore like I do at the house I've been able to reflect on life and the part of which I want to write about and share with others. I don't think any of us want to go back to Louisville, Jeff has already said that he'd just as soon go to school here rather than go back to Doss. Sierra on the other hand told me the other day on the phone that she doesn't want to live here of course I told her in no uncertain terms would she go to high school in Louisville, I'm just not going to allow that and she agreed that she didn't want to either. So I dunno what we will do.

Well breakfast is just about cooked, I've been cooking and writing inbetween time so now that it's almost done I will shut up for now....I need to learn to shorten these things somehow!! Have a good day!