Subscribe with Bloglines The Whatever File: 04/26/05


Explanation of who people are in my dreams

If you want to read the dreams in sequence go to the sidebar to your right -------------->
and click on the dates in order.

Names of people in my dreams and their background or my relation to them.

Bobby is my husband. We went to school together and met again 5 yrs. ago, we have been married for almost 3 yrs. now.

Sierra is my daughter and she recently had open heart surgery in Nov. 2004, it was her 3rd surgery.

John Daniel is my son, who recently started college.

Jeffrey and Todd are my stepsons, who lives with their mom.
Todd is severely handicapped and has restricted movement.

Laura is Bobby’s ex wife and mother to Bobby’s boys. She is a mormon. The church has filled her with all kinds of ideas and such.

Gayle, Sheila, John, and Richie are my brothers and sister’s.

The girls usually refer to Sierra and my sister, Sheila’s little girl Carissa.

Sue and Lucille are Sierra and John's great grandma and grandma.

Jeff was an old boyfriend if you want to call him that. He was a manic-depressive and was hooked on drugs. He worshiped pot. In the end he had deceived me and the whole time we were together he basically used me or maybe we used each other.

Dream 1/18/05

I dreamed that something had happened, like if it were the end of the world. And it was like we had to figure out some word puzzle or something that showed in the sun? We were in what I thought was a school and I was trying to see the board that had the letters or numbers listed that were "the signs in the sun" so that I could figure out the puzzle. I kept trying to get closer to look. It was like someone was talking to me telling me that they could give me my heart's desire...... and Jeff(an old boyfriend was there and he was saying how this person had gotten him out of prison.....I think it was like they wanted me to believe if I would just get on the train I'd have my hearts desire....I remember feeling slightly afraid and kept trying to talk my way out of it saying there was nothing I wanted and this person kept giving me examples...etc... then I am at the front where I can see to write down these letters and then I am suddenly talking to a woman who is behind a pulpit, I think we are talking about God but yet she is not mentioning who we are talking about but she is finding fault with his kingdom and I am defending his kingdom and then Laura, my hubby’s ex leans over and whispers to her that, "I am one of them", and I say “I know what she's telling you and yes I am” but I feel nervous now but she just keeps on talking...etc... while were talking I remember changing the subject on her while I was looking out a door and I remember that this isn't a school but its a church, a church that my grandmother went to or my mother and I am talking about this, remenising. This church didn't look like providence so I don't exactly know what church it was, it seemed like it was a brick church, old fashioned looking but yet it was sorta big or had big high windows like they did in old places. then we are back in this like classroom that we were in before all this began and we are talking about this party thats about to begin and I'm think I'm not happy about it and it seems like people are getting tatoos and I am frustrated at the expense of this party and I look to see what Laura is doing and she is tatooing something on Todd's, my handicapped stepson back and he seems like he is in pain. this is where I wake up.
I remember thinking about this dream while I was still waking up and it was like it dawned on me that the Antichrist is a woman and I immediately made me think of Hillary Clinton.

Dream 12/16/04

Dream 12-16-04

We were all in the house and Sierra, my daughter and I both woke up I think because we heard a noise. I got up and opened the door to look outside, while I was opening the door I could hear the wind whistling. Sierra started to open the screen and I pulled her back when I seen how hard the wind was blowing. We stood there and watched as a white car that was parked on the street was swept forward with the wind, crumbling the car to pieces as it went. It swept across to a bunch of cars that were in front of my neighbors house, crashing into them and moving them, they all started moving and swept back across the street hitting my hubby’s van and moving it until they were all a bundled heap. As they started blowing down the street we leaned forward and as we did I noticed the pull behind air compressor tumbling our way hitting the other neighbors car as it went. I pulled Sierra back and I slammed the door shut and moved back, as I did it came crossing through our front window before blowing passed our house. The window was a picture window not the window we have on the front of the house.
We ran to the back door and the back porch was gone, the garage was gone and in a tumbled heap, the wooden fence too was pulling from the ground and swaying forward. I felt that the wind was so cold it would cut you in two if you were out in it. I remember the house looking a lot different inside, we had rooms with doors and walls that looked like they were partly built. The house was shaking back and forth and you could feel the wind coming through the house, it sounded as if it would blow away at any minute. I took us to a closet in the center of the house, a closet that we don’t have in reality and it had a mattress in it and concrete walls and we went in and wrapped the mattress around us to protect us. There was a lot more to this dream, something about Bobby and my son, John going to go somewhere in this weather, like they have to go and I was upset because I knew if they went outside they’d be cut in half by the wind.

Dream 8/27/04

I’m dreaming about Mom again. In this dream I am happy to see her because I haven’t seen her in awhile. I remember hugging her. I ask her where she is living at and she won’t tell me, she seems to be mysterious about it. I notice she has a pin on her shirt that says, “Europe” on it and I say, “Oh you’ve been to Europe lately?” and she seems uncomfortable with me asking and she finally says, “my mother took me there when I was a kid” she’s not looking at me when she says this and I feel like she is not telling me the truth. For some reason I feel that she is wealthy now and she seems so happy. Maybe I even mention something about needing to borrow money and she tells me Rick is going to invest in some stock, she names it but I cannot remember it now and she says, “isn’t that exciting?” We are shopping, I am thinking its some holiday, my thoughts are Thanksgiving but it may have been Christmas because she is buying presents. I remember telling her I am so glad she is back because I have so many questions to ask her about how she dealt with things in her life and I want her to stay around so we can talk. She acts like they have a lot to do or as if she may not be around long. Somewhere in the dream I remember her hugging me and then later when I am talking with someone else Mom is not there anymore and I pull out a $100 bill and I realize that she put it in my pocket when she hugged me

Another time in 2004

Things I seen in my dream to remember:

*I felt crazy, I was doing strange carzy things. I was walking around a block in a bad neighborhood. I was crazy enough to be put away.

*I had these egg yokes and I was suppose to bust them and I did but the last one was really large and out of it came like 5 or 6 yokes and they turned into baby birds and were crying. It scared me so I set them outside and when I turned around there was this cat who had had babies, one baby was much, much larger than the other, maybe the size of a half way grown cat and the other one was so small I could fit it in my hand. The big one ran into the house but the small was lying by the door so that when you opened it, you would rub the door overtop if it. I brought them in the house and tried to feed the little one but it didn’t know how to eat and the big one kept eating all the food. Finally the little one figured out how to get the food in its mouth and started eating but I had to watch it or it would drown itself in the food. I picked up the big one and its fur still felt like newborn fur and its face still looked newborn with eyes still closed but I felt it was heavy in my hand. I put them in a box but the big one kept getting out. I remember being so tired, I just couldn’t stay awake even though I could see the big one getting out and I went to sleep. I woke up and there was paper lining the edges of the floors so the cats could walk on it and go to the bathroom and I noticed there was all this poop on the floor. I picked up the big kitten and it started going to the bathroom on my hand so I put it back down and looked around and there were more cats and kittens then when I fell asleep. The littlest one was climbing on the walls.

Sometime in 2004

It’s the end of the world as we know it, I see the incoming storm, Sheila and Gayle and the girls are getting stuff out of the van as I watch from the door and yell at them to look up because its coming. We all rush down these stairs, deep, way down into the underground. The house we are in just reminds me of a big old Victorian style house with the long windows and high ceilings.

Later, someone calls and ask if they can come to our location and we go to let them in. As we are walking around the landing of the staircase I see these two little boys hiding in a tent and I tell the person who is with me to get them so I can take care of these other people and all the while the storm is raging, the windows are long and open and the curtains are flying, rain is coming in, the wind is blowing. And I look back and he is on his knees trying to get the boys who think it’s a game and crawl behind a fake fireplace, he finally gets them but then one gets away as he is walking away and he just says forget it, he can’t do it. I am so angry that he would leave a child behind. We keep going in order to get others down to safety and then I turn around and go back for the boy, I look out in the parking lot and there is just more and more people running wanting to go in the underground for safety. I remember my stepdad who is dead came to help and got the boy for me.

Dream 10/14/2003

October 14, 2003
Here's what I can remember about the dream I had.. I was with all kinds of people walking toward a place. I feel as though we were going through a time of trials and tribulations. Jesus or someone whom I'm assuming was Jesus or one of his angels? were telling us what we had to go through and that we should just keep following through because at the end we would see God defeat the Devil and then we would go on to Heaven. It was like we were going through this maze and along the way we would encounter other people and tell them where we were going and invite them to go with us and to follow Jesus.....Some got excited and joined us, while others refused and we would move on. I remember passing by a door and I thought this was the way we were suppose to go but we went on past it. Then we came to another door with one of those half doors and the top half was opened and upon looking inside there were people working, like an office. We stopped to ask for directions(ok, this is a and we ask these people the way to go and ask if they would go with us too. One lady held up a ticket and said, "yes, I'm going I have my ticket right here" and another one said she didn't want to go. Anyway, it seems like we had to go through this bloody door, there was blood everywhere on the door and around it(could be the blood of the Saints?) and we went through this door. As I said we were in aline everyone going in this maze...following the maze...etc....Anyway, as I open the door or whoever it is that is in line with me does and we go through it, I have this sense that I start flying(I don't know if I have ever had a flying dream before) and I'm looking down and I see people in another place maybe another maze but it doesn't look like a maze but a wide open corridor...everything is white or bright and the people in the corridor are all walking in the same direction I am flying, they are all in white and they seem happy, joyful....and I look down and I am waving at these people some who I know like my mother in law and grandmother in law, Sue and Lucille(both are still alive), and then I see my Mom(who died in 97) and I'm so happy because I think, "Ohhhh, Mom is in Heaven and I'm going to see her again" and I know I must squeal with excitement as I wave at her, maybe I yelled out that I loved her I think.

Then after the flying is over we are all in this factory like place, its dark, musky, and damp. There is all of these people, some saved, some unsaved and we are there to be tested and wait for God to defeat the devil. Its a dark place, it seems at each turn we are tested and the Person who is guiding us says not to worry that its just the devil testing us and we need to believe....There is this one test I guess is what you'd call it where a dark skinned/haired woman who I think is the devil. She makes this stuff appear in a bucket that is roting and has a horrible stench. Then she says she is leaving us to go have lunch and will be back later....she and her cohorts leave and its like she's doing this as a means to test us maybe to see what we can stand...I dunno. Well it starts to really stink and our Guide tells us that its an illusion and we start to walk around where the unsaved people are and there is a bucket next to each of these people and the Guide is saying, "see, they have roting stuff too but they don't smell it because it is an illusion". I guess the theme here is that their's doesn't stink to them because they are people who haven't been saved and they will be made to suffer later? After this there is like a concession type area and I or someone says they are thirsty and we go to get some bottled water but I am or someone is afraid to drink it because we think this is a trick that the devil woman is pulling on us but the guide says it ok and to drink so we do.

Anyway, at some point in the dream, again out of sequence I can remember sitting on the floor and looking around the corner because it was real bright and seeing a smaller aparation(Glowing, white, Heavenly...Jesus?) and then a larger one holding the smaller ones hand, like God and Jesus and I'm like excited and pointing them out to the person who is sitting beside me. I remember after this that Sue and Lucille were there talking to us and we were asking Sue questions about being in Heaven and she is telling us how she has no regrets and wouldn't ever want to come back and I ask her if she has seen Johnny(her husband who died several years ago) and I'm worried about her answer because I think what if Johnny didn't make it to Heaven and then she will be all sad and we will be sad to know that people we love who aren't saved won't be in Heaven with us and this would hurt but then she says she saw him for a few minutes and they were going to catch up later. It seems like she said she would still want to be there even if he wasn't. Anyway, after this I remember the woman coming back from lunch and then it seems like we are laying all in a row on this dark, factory floor and she is telling us about sins and how some people have them hanging on them like a "house number sign"(I see all these people with street address signs on them) like they are proud of what they are...etc...Proud of their sins. Then she is pointing out people standing on crates with ropes around there heads being hung. Anyway, she goes back to her story and says, "now, lets play a game," (or I think this is what she said) she says to us, "do you think that your sins are any different just because yours are hidden?" and then she say, "lets start with you" as she is taking her finger and reaching out to touch someone, she touches me...I remember watching her finger as it lands on the side of my ribcage and her finger is hot, like fire and when she touches me I looked down and it hurt. Then this rope appears in front of me and I am up in the air grasping, holding onto the rope and frantically begging and crying, yelling that I know I am a sinner, and I know I did all these things wrong but I have been saved and I love Jesus and I want to be with Jesus more than anything, that I would rather be in Heaven rather than enjoy my sins any longer....... I am frantic because I don't know where this rope is taking me and I look up and see a window above me that I go crashing through and into the air, all the while I am praying and crying saying how much I love Jesus and how I accepted him for my Lord and Saviour....etc..... Then I crash through this glass window and I'm hanging in midair facing these two time clocks and I am handed a timecard and as I look at the card I see a glowing word that says, "Heaven" and I'm thinking I have to punch in a number on a keypad on the front of the clock or click the timecard in the slot. I remember being confused thinking I have to do this to get into Heaven but seeing out of the corner of my eye the time clock on my right says hell on it and has an out of order sign on it. At the same time I am struggling to hold onto this rope or I think I will fall, maybe fall to hell? but then I realize that I am suspended in the air and I start laughing and I am happy because I am being held up by Jesus maybe. Then I wake myself up laughing and yelling, "Thank you, Jesus".

I realize now that I've waken myself up that I didn't punch the timecard yet and in a sense I continue dreaming but I'm awake and all these voices(while I was asleep too) are giving me doubts like I didn't make it to Heaven....etc... and I, in my wakenness am frantic to punch the card in the Heaven slot. I think my thought is now looking back that in my half wakefulness, what Jesus is saying to me is, "I have taken my eyes off Jesus and am being doubtful" because in my dream I guess with looking at the time clocks and realizing that the hell one was out of order I didn't have to worry but then I woke up and started doubting, trying frantically to put that card in the Heaven time clock because I wanted to make sure I went to Heaven., I feel like I kept hearing theses voices or thinking these doubts about really wanting to go to Heaven and if I had really wanted to go to Heaven why didn't I put the card in the timeslot....etc....(is this the devil trying to make me doubt orwhat?!?!?!)but ya know the thing is when I got to this point where I was suspended in air before the time clocks I am giddy and happy and that is where I yelled, "Thank You Jesus" and my yelling is what woke me up because I really yelled that out

Dream 12/11/03

I have been feeling very sinful lately, dirty, unforgiven. I fall asleep praying.

In my dream:

I’m scared, I feel drawn into the sinful person I was before, doing the things I did before and I guess maybe I’m scared and I’m trying to fight it. Anyway, I see the devil and he is letting me know he is getting closer and closer to me and I am piling up boxes by the back door trying to keep him out. I feel confident that no one is going to get through that door and I look and the door is opened, I get scared and I get Sierra who is a baby in my dream, I'm not even sure its really Sierra. We are hiding among the boxes, I’m holding the Bible and reading and praying as he is looking for us but it seems he knows where we are at. I see the walls start tattering apart, the boxes are slipping away but I’m still hiding in what seems like the dark but I am able to read the Bible, then I can’t read it anymore because its too dark. He seems to be around me but cannot get too me, I’m holding onto the Bible saying the Lord’s pray, and trying to remember other prayers. I Tell him he cannot get to me, to get behind me(I must have shouted it out in my sleep I feel like I did it was so real) Then we, whomever I am with run out from this place trying to get away from this evil place because we realize that its all getting more evil, they are playing music on the radio that says I am satan….etc… I know the time is getting near.

Welcome to My Blog!!!

Ok, so this is my blog..... It's the 2nd one I've done, the other one disappeared somewhere in cyberspace yesterday and I can't get it back. So if you see my other blog please lemme know!!

I am starting this blog thingy because I like to write and I also have these weird dreams. I thought it would be kinda cool to have a place I can go when I get up in the middle of the night and write down what I just dreamed. I like to write down my dreams though I have to admit sometimes I'm terribly lazy and I don't want to get up and run into the other room to write em down at the 'puter.

My dreams are vivid and spiritual alot of the times, I am not proclaiming to be a prophet, a pyschic, or any fortune teller I just have weird dreams.

That being said, I also like to write stories and poetry but I haven't done this for many years. I use to write alot of poems whenever I had a broken heart but wouldn't ya know I found the love of my life about 5 yrs. ago and haven't thought of a broken hearted poem since then!!!

Alittle about me: I'm a 41 yo mom of two of my own and two stepkids. I'm a christian, I'm a Jesus Freak, I love God!! I'm also married to a wonderful man who happens to be just right for me. I'm a stay at home mom (sahm), I sell on Ebay, and I love to compute. On weekends I like to yard sale and flea marketing and just hanging out with my family.

Well, I think that is good enough for now!! Keep reading:)